living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
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