We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Dicks are not precious.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
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