I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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