Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Randomize
