So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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