don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
It's official drugs can't kill me
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
