Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize