I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize