More tranny stories later!
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
BRING THE BAGELS
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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