I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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