If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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