There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I wannas sexs uuuuu
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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