The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize