Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
