the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
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