will power is for people who don't want to get laid
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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