If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
