You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
you traded sex for a burrito?
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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