Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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