I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
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