I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Your topless pictures make me question reality
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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