dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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