all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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