I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
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