So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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