I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
