My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize