That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
