I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
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