better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
