i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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