I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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