ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize