so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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