Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
