Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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