I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
