All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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