umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
