hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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