You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
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