he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Just cropdusted the office
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
