he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Randomize
