Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
he shaved USA in his pubs
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
