I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Randomize
