They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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