Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
