I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
are you so shy because you have an std?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
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