I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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