She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize